A very nice, patient man at eBay - God knows how he coped with a drunken woman who could barely see the screen, let alone steer the mouse around it - helped me to unlist and relist my auction on eBay with a more realistic shipping fee. It is now $20 instead of $3000. Thanks to a friend for bidding on my ridiculous item previously. She even offered me her dog in lieu of the hefty shipping fee.
I think the $3000 fee was in violation of eBay's shipping policy anyway. I have put a reserve of $20 on the tray table + $20 shipping. I am not calling that poor man again.
And, actually, I don't really want a dog, although the dog in question is a very nice one.
So the auction is here now. Get your bids in - only 6 days left.